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Long ago in a time best forgotten, the once-peaceful realm of Vaisnisht is about to erupt into rampaging violence interrupted by erotic interludes and lots of yelling. The Cohen, ruler of this troubled land, has become extremely dead, and the fabled Porcelain Throne is up for grabs. The grabbing won't be polite and restrained either, but the brutal kind that could cause painful hangnails. At the center of the noisy drama is Lord Nathen Shtarker, a noble nobleman, though something of a schmuck. He and his proud family stand against the Bannisters, ne Blonsky, a clan as evil as they are wicked....