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I am writing these words because I am tortured and tormented day and night. For weeks and now months, I have fought a fierce battle that I know I cannot win alone. There have been moments that I was certain my heart would stop or that the weight of this burden would surely stop my breathing. The absolute despair and depression have been unbearable, and I wondered at times if I would survive. Only with God's divine intervention can I find the person that I want and need to be.

Nobody knows baseball like Kevin Kennedy

Kevin Kennedy was a catcher and a Montreal, coach in the minors, a farm director for the Expos and a bench coach for Felipe Alou before moving on to manage the Texas Rangers and the Boston Red Sox. Now one of the sport's most respected analysts and commentators, he offers a fresh look at baseball from the viewpoint of a "lifer," capturing the intricacies of the professional game with a sharp analytical eye and unabashed candor, including:

• The lengths to which teams and players will go to gain the competitive edge -- from doctored...