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Like most New England Patriots fans, Tommy has a problem: his balls. They are deflated. What is he to do with his deflated balls, and how can his hero, Tom Brady, help?

WARNING: EXPLICIT MATERIAL not intended for children under the age of eighteen, persons who take themselves too seriously, and New England Patriots fans.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Arrow Rivendell was an early adopter of ecstasy, according to Arrow's kindergarten class. Don't do drugs kids, or you'll end up writing New England Football Comedic Erotica too (and possibly Dino Porn).

"Naughty and hilarious "

Boned by LeGarrette's Blunt: A Tale of New England Football Erotica

Warning: Discretion advised. This short novella is funny, explicit and raunchy New England Football Erotica. It is not Mommy and Daddy's soft erotica and it is not suitable for children under the age of 18. Read at your own risk, only if you are ready to unleash your craziest football desires and fantasies, or just laugh a lot. It is supposed to be funny.

Pascale Hunts lay in bed at night, alone, like most New England Patriots fans, obsessing over LeGarrette's Blunt. Unable to sleep, she...

BONED BY THE T-REX: The Dino Love Bone Series, Book II

Warning: Discretion advised. This is funny, explicit, and raunchy dinosaur erotica. It is not Mommy and Daddy's soft erotica and it is not suitable for children under the age of 18. Read at your own risk, only if you are ready to unleash your craziest desires and fantasies, and laugh a lot.

After being spurned by Terris men and her own Green Gangaru tribe mates, Liwen "Stinky" Need-A-Dick is cast out. To regain her status in the tribe, and finally get satisfaction, she vows to seduce the mightiest dinosaur of them all: the t-rex....

HILARIOUS AND DEMENTED AND HILARIOUSLY DEMENTED

Warning: Discretion advised. This is funny, explicit and raunchy dinosaur erotica. It is not Mommy and Daddy's soft erotica and it is not suitable for children under the age of 18. Read at your own risk, only if you are ready to unleash your craziest desires and fantasies, or are just ready to laugh a lot.

The three Green Box Ganguro leaders, Madhu Go-Anywhere, Pascale Hunts, and Liwen "Stinky" Need-A-Dick, unlock their hidden desires as they chase and try to mate with the might triceratops, the deadly t-rex, and the savage baryonyx.

Boned By The Triceratops: The Dino Love Bone Series, Book I

Warning: Discretion advised. This is funny, explicit, and raunchy dinosaur erotica. It is not Mommy and Daddy's soft erotica and it is not suitable for children under the age of 18. Read at your own risk, only if you are ready to unleash your craziest desires and fantasies, or just want to laugh a lot.

Madhu, the most celebrated cockdoll maker in her tribe and a rampant, unrepentant masturbator, is looking for satisfaction wherever she can find it. But if men and her toys continue to disappoint her, would she dare turn to...

Boned By The Baryonyx: The Dino Love Bone Series, Book III

Warning: Discretion advised. This is funny, explicit and raunchy dinosaur erotica. It is not Mommy and Daddy's soft erotica and it is not suitable for children under the age of 18. Read at your own risk, only if you are ready to unleash your craziest desires and fantasies, or are just ready to laugh a lot.

After failing in her quest to bang the mighty t-rex, Liwen "Stinky" Need-A-Dick is banished from yet another tribe, forced to suck the gauntlet, and given the ultimate challenge. Will she finally get fulfilled, or will her...