Satyryczna

Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit Delivering belly laughs, hee-haws, and downright slackjaw amazement, this hilarious guide to the homeland of George W. and Willie Nelson is the essential how-to for surviving in the Lone Star State. From strange Texas laws and the history of Dr. Pepper to "Texas Talk" (in which a "turd floater" is a heavy downpour) and final-meal requests by death row inmates, Kinky Friedman, "the oldest living Jew in Texas who doesn't own any real estate," provides an insider's guide that will be loved by native Texans and the rest of us poor devils...

Why do some people retain cute baby-talk names for their relatives (like "Num-Num" and "Pee-Paw") well into middle age? How should a reasonable person respond when Olivia Newton-John sings, "Have you never been mellow?" Who's responsible for the sorry state of men's fashion, and is it the same guy who invented the jerkin? Is there any future in being a Midwesterner? Can you really enjoy your lunch when the restaurant is decorated to look like an African plain? How come women keep dozens of bottles and jars of moisturizers, unguents, and lotions around -- all of them half empty?

In more...

Universal and timeless, Delia Ephron's How to Eat Like a Child is a delightful revisiting of the joys -- and tricky ploys -- of childhood. Made into a children's television special and a musical theater revue performed across the country each year, How to Eat Like a Child offers advice beyond the artful etiquette of food consumption. Ephron also teaches us "How to Laugh Hysterically," "How to Have a Birthday Party," "How to Torture Your Sister," and much, much more. As the Washington Post Book World noted, After the giggles of recognition have subsided, one thing...

Witty, wise, and just plain wonderful, the inaugural volume of this biennial, Mirth of a Nation, ensured a place for the best contemporary humor writing in the country. And with this second treasury, Michael J. Rosen has once again assembled a triumphant salute to one of America's greatest assets: its sense of humor. More than five dozen acclaimed authors showcase their hilariously inventive works, including Paul Rudnick, Henry Alford, Susan McCarthy, Media Person Lewis Grossberger, Ian Frazier, Richard Bausch, Amy...

The strange land of Washington, D.C., is teeming with aliens, politicians, and other bizarre life-forms. Beltway insider and stuffy talk show host John Oliver Banion finds his privileged life turned topsy-turvy when he is abducted by aliens from his exclusive country-club golf course. When he is abducted a second time, he believes he has found his true calling and, in the most pasionate crusade of his life, demands that Congress and the White House seriously investigate the existence of extraterrestrials and UFOs. Friends and family, meanwhile, urge Banion to seek therapy before his...

Do you have what it takes to be a Grrl Genius? Of course you do You are a smart, funny, beautiful Grrl Genius -- just because you say you are. In The Grrl Genius Guide to Life, stand-up comic and Grrl Genius Club founder Cathryn Michon explains why she is a genius and demonstrates how you can become one, too, by following her easy twelve-step program.

The first step in the program is the most important: Admit that you are a Grrl Genius. Acknowledge that you are beautiful, intelligent, and talented and that you are the only person in the world who can...

Helen Bradshaw isn't exactly living out her dreams. She's a lowly assistant editor at GirlTime magazine, she drives an ancient Toyota, and she has a history of choosing men who fall several thousand feet below acceptable boyfriend standard. Not to mention that she shares an apartment with a scruffy, tactless roommate, her best girlfriends are a little too perfect, and the most affectionate male in her life--her cat, Fatboy--occasionally pees in her underwear draw.

Then Helen gets the telephone call she least expects: Her father has had a massive heart attack. Initially...

Jackie Mason, one of the true kings of comedy, and his pen-pal partner, celebrity divorce lawyer Raoul Felder, go after America's lowlifes, scumbags, and everyone else who's schmucking up the world.

This book spares no one. Politicians, sports stars, celebrities, corporations, publishers, world leaders--they're all fair game. If you're a crook, a phony, or just somebody who Jackie and Raoul find annoying, there is a fair chance you will be on the list.

Combining insightful political satire, hilarious observations on the foibles of modern life, and impeccable timing,...

The Men's Guide to the Women's Bathroom strives to answer life's most imponderable question: What Do Women Really Do in the Bathroom?

When the witty and urbane Claire St. John leaves New York City and returns to Austin, Texas, she realizes that all of the good advice she has ever received has been from strangers in the women's bathroom. If only she'd listened before she'd married the wrong man and wound up on the losing end of a divorce.

Swearing off men, Claire decides to take a big chance--she will quit her life as a lawyer and write the ultimate self-help book--a...

What do George W. Bush, Wal-Mart, Halliburton, gangsta rap, and SUVs have in common? They're all among the hundred ways in which America is screwing up the world. The country that was responsible for many, if not most, of the twentieth century's most important scientific and technological advancements now demonizes its scientists and thinkers in the twenty-first, while dumbing down its youth with anti-Darwin/pro-"Intelligent Design" propaganda. The longtime paragon of personal freedoms now supports torture and illegal wiretapping—spreading its principles and policies at gunpoint while...

Sunshine State trivia buff Serge A. Storms loves eliminating jerks and pests. His drug-addled partner Coleman loves cartoons. Hot stripper Sharon Rhodes loves cocaine, especially when purchased with rich dead men's money.

On the other hand, there's Sean and David, who love fishing and are kind to animals -- and who are about to cross paths with a suitcase filled with $5 million in stolen insurance money. Serge wants the suitcase. Sharon wants the suitcase. Coleman wants more drugs . . . and the suitcase. In the meantime, there's murder by gun, Space Shuttle, Barbie doll, and Levi's...

Welcome to Kettle, Wisconsin, a town where everyone knows nothing bad ever happens.

Enter Lorelei Taylor--notorious, glamorous, and hot off a not-guilty murder verdict that stunned the nation. To the women of Kettle, bad things seem suddenly inevitable . . .

Sarah Gilchrist--A perfect house and garden can't quite make up for a marriage that's a wreck. Sarah is determined to rise above her opinion of Kettle's dreadful newcomer and give her a perfect welcome. But in the face of Lorelei's outrageous provocations, Sarah's control starts to unravel.

Erin...

James Pinocchio wakes up in the back of a New York City taxi with a combination lock piercing his left ear and no idea how it got there, or what the combination is.

The following day, his wealthy parents decide they've had enough, and they send him off to Sleepy Hollow, the famous rehab facility in Upstate New York. While there, Mr. Pinocchio meets all sorts of Fascinating Characters, one more Unbelievable and Amazing than the next, and they challenge him to confront his Deepest, Darkest Fears. The experience leads Mr. Pinocchio to the very edges of despair, but at a critical...

Denis Cooverman wanted to say something really important in his high school graduation speech. So, in front of his 512 classmates and their 3,000 relatives, he announced: "I love you, Beth Cooper."

It would have been such a sweet, romantic moment. Except that Beth, the head cheerleader, has only the vaguest idea who Denis is. And Denis, the captain of the debate team, is so far out of her league he is barely even the same species. And then there's Kevin, Beth's remarkably large boyfriend, who's in town on furlough from the United States Army. Complications ensue.

For the uninitiated, the quinceanera celebrates the passage of a fifteen-year-old girl into adulthood: It's a bit bat mitzvah with a dash of debutante ball, and loaded with the same potential for hilarity and adolescent angst. In this original anthology, fifteen of the brightest and funniest Latino writers, men and women alike, share their own memories of these moving and often absurd extravaganzas--tales of that unique form of familial humiliation that is borne of the best intentions, fierce love, and the infectious joy of parents finally allowing their little girl to grow up.

You know who you are: you're one of the one billion adults who takes pleasure in smoking cigarettes. This one-of-a-kind treasure trove of memories, meditations, fascinating facts, tantalizing trivia, wit, and wisdom about smoking will only enhance the unparalleled pleasure of lighting up

Did you know: Nearly 15 billion cigarettes are sold worldwide daily--about 10 million cigarettes every minute. . . . A single tablespoon of tobacco seeds can sow six acres of land. . . . Lucky Strike was originally the name of a chewing tobacco sold during the Gold Rush?

Gone are the...

From New York Times bestselling author Armistead Maupin, now available in paperback--the novel that spawned the entire Tales of the City series, Armistead Maupin's hugely successful San Francisco saga. This new paperback edition is part of the Harper Perennial P.S. program.

For almost four decades Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City has blazed its own trail through popular culture--from a groundbreaking newspaper serial to a classic novel, to a television event that entranced millions around the world. The first of nine novels...

Hundreds of thousands of people around the world have read--and reread--Christopher Moore's irreverent, iconoclastic, and divinely funny tale of the early life of Jesus Christ as witnessed by his boyhood pal Levi bar Alphaeus (a.k.a. Biff). Now, in this special (check out the cool red ribbon marker, gilt-edged pages, and gold lettering) gift edition of Christopher Moore's bestselling Lamb, you, too, can find out what really happened between the manger and the Sermon on the Mount. And, in a new afterword written expressly for this edition, Christopher Moore addresses some of the...