Ross O'Carroll-Kelly, class hero, schools rugby star and all-round legend, joins his friends at college, where he is attracted by the education possibilities; where else can you learn about Judge Judy and laminating fake IDs?

So there I was, roysh, twenty-three years of age, still, like, gorgeous and rich ... when all of a sudden life becomes a total mare.

'So there I was, roysh, putting the 'in' in 'in crowd' ... But being a schools rugby legend has its downsides.' This is where it all began: the formation of the phenomenon that is Ross O'Carroll-Kelly. With a new introduction by Paul Howard, Ross's representative on, loike, earth?

'So there I was, roysh, enjoying college life, college birds and, like, a major amount of socialising.' Can Ross survive outside Castlerock College?