Mostly True Excerpts

"I might even get to see a real wild bison before they all disappear into a zoo or commercial ranch where they will join cows in their lifelong quest to become hamburger or jerky."

"Think of the bedlam at the coffee shop if all the dogs in the back of the trucks decided to change places with each other. Can you just imagine the confusion when they can't find their pickup in the parking lot because there is a poodle in the back instead of a pit bull?"

"Well, I don't want to get young. I worked hard to get old and have earned every wrinkle, every...