In the very near future, only the rich and the devious have privacy. The Snowden Avalanche has revealed the private transgressions of ordinary US citizens in such astonishing numbers that the whole aggrieved nation has come to the collective decision that the Puritan prudery of America's first settlers finally, and forever, has to be kicked to the curb.

Manhattan-based iAesthetician Sabina Hrafnsson has made a lucrative career out of buffing up the images of those who got caught in the Snowden Avalanche with their metaphorical (and sometimes literal) pants down. Aside from her...