Ever since he was a young orphan, Hansel Higginzshire's dream has been to break the long-held Guinness World Record for hottest gay man ever killed in a shark attack. Big Problem #1: Hansel is not hot. At least not in the classical sense. In fact, the deformed man has a head the size of a wrecking ball. Big Problem #2: Hansel digs chicks, not dudes. Still, that shouldn't stop a big-headed mofo from dreaming big, no But if those obstacles weren't enough to impede Hansel's path to Guinness World Record greatness, he finds himself wanted for murder. Now on the lam, his situation pretty hopeless,...