"The boys got me riding lessons for Christmas. They were obviously trying to interest me in a new hobby. Bing's ill-concealed attempt to distract me from telling stories about the family (and publishing them) hadn't fooled me in the least. The other gifts - a decoupage kit (seriously? Fussy painting and artistic talent required? What were they thinking?), a tennis racquet (no way am I baring my crepe-y thighs - I'll take up tennis again when it's played in bloomers), calligraphy pens (once again, artistic talent is required, so it's not an option) - were stacked in a closet. Way in the back....