In 2009, T McKinley's brother committed suicide, and his first question to himself was why he hadn't done the same. In this moving and poignant memoir, McKinley takes the reader back through the events that led to a lifelong struggle with depression, shame, and inadequacy. Beginning with his own conception and birth and continuing through his parents' divorce and the fragmentation of his family, McKinley traces the origins and evolution of his deep-seated belief that everyone would have been better off if he had never existed at all. In this way, McKinley blamed, rejected, and buried his...