Most coming-of-age stories are fraught with symbolism, hidden metaphors, and a heaping mound of other literary devices. Not this one. Not mine. You see, I came of age while working at a dusty Texas feed store. A place where To Kill a Mockingbird involved a twelve-year-old and a BB gun. Of Mice and Men was a problem easily solved with rat poison. And David Copperfield, nothing more than a dude that made shit disappear.

The Feedstore Chronicles is a mostly true account of my education amongst murderous ex-wives, a well-hung bulldog, and...