It's the age-old tale of boy meets alien abductor. Boy meets stun-gun. Boy learns he's the only one who can save the Earth from Extreme World Makeover by interstellar landlords. Yeah: he thinks it's a bit much, too. Like everyone else on his planet, Bertram Ludlow hasn't paid much attention to fluctuations in the intergalactic real estate market. But as a cognitive psychology grad student, he has given some thought to what a complete mental breakdown looks like. And this is pretty close. Now he's discovering space is a mad and mind-boggling place where interspecies communication rests on the...

Life in the Greater Communicating Universe isn't easy. But "death" now that has its perks.
For Rollie Tsmorlood, escaping a prison planet that no one ever survives... well, it's more than a smart lifestyle choice. It's the perfect chance to unleash some covert revenge.
But when someone steals the number three for ransom, suddenly Rollie's not the only one looking for justice. Universal systems have ground to a halt. A third of the universe is trapped in a mysterious viral field. Even the Earth's stuck in a looky-no-touchy zone.
Add to this, Rollie's beloved ship has been sold...