"We cannot see what we don't understand. Finally a book about abuse that blazes a path through the complex dynamics of domestic violence and helps the one who is being hurt to look at herself - with compassion and tough love. To be strategic and smart. To choose herself. This fairy tale busting, no-bullshit, no judgement gem of a book brings together the collaborative genius of a brilliant therapist and a courageous survivor of abuse and offers stories, strategies and solutions to one of the most misunderstood and intractable of human predicaments: when a woman loves a man who hurts her....