This guide to self-discovery through intimate relationships offers a spiritual perspective on healing childhood wounds and destructive patterns that are learned early on and later cause relationship dysfunction in adulthood.

Suffering Is Optional: Three Keys to Freedom and Joy centers around three basic aspects of Zen practice: pay attention, believe nothing, and don t take anything personally. As ending suffering requires that one sees how suffering happens, the book urges readers to be willing to be quiet and pay attention to the process of suffering in effort to see each moment as an opportunity to step beyond illusion into freedom. It also argues that examining beliefs, abandoning them, and returning attention to the present is essential to ending suffering, as is living in the awareness that nothing...

Rather than explaining typical strategies for overcoming fear, this book examines how fear is an experience, how to recognize that experience as nothing more than conditioned reaction to circumstance, and how to mentor oneself into letting go of beliefs about "appropriate" responses to fear. The notion is debunked that fear is anything other than a label we have learned to put on a set of physical and emotional responses, which is a Buddhist view of emotion in general. The revised edition expands on many points and includes a series of exercises and new illustrations for recognizing fear for...