You can be little, and you can be old, but that doesn't mean you have to be a little old lady.

We've all seen her. She's hunched forward, her blue hair is tucked neatly under a plastic rain bonnet, she's clutching expired coupons, and she's discussing her latest health problems over lunch. She's a little old lady . . . and she's coming your way at 2 m.p.h.

Little old ladies have elastic waistbands on all their slacks. They save rubber bands, remember 15-cent McDonald's hamburgers, and have never seen a public rest room that was clean enough.

How Not to Become a Little Old Lady...

A crotchety old man decided to wash his sweatshirt. He threw it in the washing machine and yelled to his wife, "What setting do I use?" His wife asked, "What does it say on the shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Texas."
If this man sounds like someone you know, chances are he's a crotchety old man
We all have a crotchety old man in our lives. Maybe he's your father, your grandfather, your brother, your husband-or, though you'd never admit it, even you
From the author of "How Not to Become a Little Old Lady" here's the companion, "How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man," a...