Symonds, Adele

Thomas Duder died on February 14th, 1993. Surviving him are his 32 manifestos, each one completely opposing one another, and a stockade of bombs for the revolution. Also 13 adorable cats, each one armed with a bloodthirsty, violent hatred of everyone not Thomas. Please arrive at his eulogy, given by Thomas Duder himself, bearing gifts. "Please don't cry for Thomas Duder, no tears, no grieving. For he probably would've beaten you up already." - Thomas Duder