Markey, Tony

Tony Markey is a runner. Haha, just kidding. He's a hack. An absolute running hack. Not in a "life hack" way, but more like in a "hey slow guy, you suck!" way. He shares his collected wisdom so others can follow in his footsteps. Only not exactly in his footsteps, because that would take forever. Like, figuratively in his footsteps. Or even better, in front of his footsteps. He's been called "heartwarmingly sarcastic" and "occasionally humorous," except for that one time in the park where that guy wouldn't stop laughing at him, but he was probably on drugs, so, you know. He excels in third-per...